Lanky Japanese Men

Took out a handy calculator and realised that I should also find a rope, the thicker the better. I should loop it over a strong ceiling fan and place a small easily-movable stool underneath it. Then I should proceed to hang myself.
Why would a calculator provoke such a strong reaction?
I calculated the amount of calories I've eaten today and the final number is like a punch in the face. Let me break it down for you:
- Savoys (-/+ 20 biscuits) - 430 calories
- Oats (1.5 cups) - 300 calories
- Cadbury Milk Chocolate (5 blocks) - 150 calories
- Cous Cous stuff (3 rolls) - 150 calories
- Malt O Milk (5 biscuits) - 160 calories

Then I added the numbers together and I felt "hung"over. Shit Shit Shit Shit Shit... I haven't even had dinner yet. Knowing that I'm seeing Mr V today, we're most likely going to have fatty heavy food for dinner. Oh shit shit shit... I am going to head to tuckshop-lady-arm-land sooner than I think.

There's 2 weeks or so till I leave for Japan too. I need to be thin for that! It's going to be breakfast, pre-lunch, post-lunch, dinner and most likely supper too. The thought of coming home and having to "work" off all that lost-self-control really scares me... its okay that now I attend gym to maintain my weight... but it would absolutely kill to HAVE to go the gym IN ORDER to get thin.
Being a woman is such a curse ugh...
But then again, watching guys pump weight that are as heavy as a child, looks difficult. I'm not sure if I could do it. And I imagine myself being one of those bony skinny guys that can't put on weight or muscle... that must be pretty hard on them. But watching these guys eat junk food, is even harder on me! McDonalds for breakfast, anyone?

And this also depends on what country you reside in. In western countries, such guys are not considered "hot stuff" but if one is from an asian country (Japan, China etc), the image of the tall lanky guy is as appealing as Brad Pitt. Not only tall and lanky, the ideal man will have light coloured hair, perfectly arched eyebrows, perfectly hydrated skin and prettyboy attitude.
I remember my trip to Japan a few years ago. I was in a Japanese bookstore and selecting a few Manga books to buy. A guy (and I specifically remember this! Funny...since I have a gold fish memory) in a purple knit top walk past me. I blinked one, and then double blinked... the guy was wearing mascara. I remember turning, as inconspicuous as possible, to my host sister demanding to know if I'd seen correctly or not. She confirmed my worst fears, men in Japan wear make up. I have nothing against men wearing make up but it was just shocking at the time!

It will be interesting to see how much Japan has changed since I was last there.